Jun. 13th, 2008

i have seen some people i know from lj here. i don't know whether to add them or not, given that i've pretty much decided not to move here just yet. there's a new place supposed to be opening up by the end of the year, called dreamwidth, and that looks promising even though the tos is worrying.

still, maybe if there were more people on my list here i'd come here more often.

hm.

May. 4th, 2008

yoo hallooooo...

why do i feel obligated to keep writing for fandom even though it just fails to interest me now? i mean, really... is it because my entire friendslist is Fandom! and it feels disloyal and kind of rude to try to just ignore the fandom part when they post about pretty much nothing else? it's really really weird.

of course, it also means that my friends list takes five minutes to read instead of three quarters of an hour, so i get to sleep in an extra half-hour if i have a full day of school.

but really, it's like fandom is this gargantuan black hole. it's impossible to get away from because everyone's pulling you back. i'm doing stand-in mod duties at one comm and still running a comm because it's new enough that nobody wants to take it over, i won't leave the friends-only communities because then i lose access to my stories, i still get requests and i still get asked to participate in exchanges and it's just like... ARGH.
then people go "why haven't you gone? you were leaving months ago?" and they don't seem to get that because their entire journal is FANDOM!oriented, i can't leave FANDOM! without ignoring them.

then people say they miss me and i wonder whether they've put my journal on a non-read filter or something.

Apr. 21st, 2008

dear fandom...

so.

it seems really strange that i come here when i leave fandom, and there's this large migration of fandom to here as well. all the things i still have at lj aren't here, though i miss being able to right-click on the menu because, hell, i like my right-click and i'm getting very good at getting around right-click-disabled things, but i digress.

some things have happened lately that have left bad tastes in places i don't want to think about tasting. this isn't about the latest rounds of Plagiarism-Drama in lotr/lotrips, though really, i disagree on principle with the people spearheading that, just because they decided to bait and then threaten people who had different points of view/disagreed/spoke out and also kept changing the post rules, editing comments and changing the issues. but really, i don't mind being on people's ban lists because i have a ban list a mile long too, only i ban people who represent more real threats than coming from a different point of view. i mean, really... i answered questions on my pov and then got banned for it. wtf?
but whatever.

this latest thing was in a comparatively small fandom. i figured, "hey, i'll compromise and play in a smaller fandom until the withdrawal isn't so bad. "
so i contribute to a fic meme.
and i get a comment back - "people were squicked. your fic has been screened. have a nice day!"
but the rules say 'all kinks welcome, we won't judge' and so on, and don't mention anything even about requiring warnings. now, this fic is on the first page of a three-page comment thread, and collapsed by default. there was a warning in the subject and the fic wasn't visible.
people were squicked by the warning, apparently, 'cos on principle, potential dub-con doesn't belong in their fandom or in their memes.
and as soon as someone came back and said 'hey i'd like to read the fic, since it's collapsed and there's a warning can it be unscreened' the mod posted back to say she'd frozen the thread because she didn't need to deal with it anymore.
i think i was reasonable about it. everyone else seemed reasonable about it (though perhaps misguided, but that's my opinion) and really, it's not like it was explosive or anything.
but the mod refused to alter the rules or even put something in the meme header to point out that there are invisible standards there, because it was too general an issue to cover. blargh? something like "all kinks are welcome, but please avoid anything extreme unless requested" (which is the message i was getting before it was revealed that the issue wasn't the extremity or the content of the fic, but the warning and the fact that i interpreted the request differently to the person who so kindly enlightened me) would be a token gesture, but it's too hard.

now if something's not welcome somewhere, you don't invite it in and then kick it out without warning, right? you put a sign up on the door 'kalypso's room, keep out' or 'hawkers and salesmen not welcome' or 'power rangers don't do chains'.

this is beyond the lauding of unreadable fics... is this pettiness what fandom's becoming? are we going back to being a bunch of little cliques instead of a community? what happened to YKINMK? 'cos i can be petty too, but i've had a lot of practice at holding grudges too, and i won't tame my writing because some people don't like it.

so fandom's slowly moving, or at least looking for a place to move to.
let me tell you another story.

i used to go to this messageboard, right? so the people on this messageboard started treating me differently, like patronising me and joking about me and assuming things. i'm an in-joke that's spread beyond the initial realm of in-joke-ness and then the board moved to a new server, new address and new system.
i didn't carry over my registration. i went there the other day and the first post i saw was about me, after a year.

is fandom, previously my happy internet social circle, going to do the same to me? i did see what was said about me on fandomwank. i have noticed that now that i don't write, i don't even get comments from people on my normal lj on my normal life entries. i am beginning to feel unwelcome.

will i carry over my account when it's time for one of my fandoms to move?

... by then, will i even want to?

Mar. 22nd, 2008

so i'm fighting through working this place out and it's all in english and i can't find a damn thing.

and what is with this 'insane' theme? i'm sure someone thinks it's cute, but diagnosis? asylum? it makes you think that livejournal should call communities 'pulses' and profiles 'heartbeats' or something. i don't think i like that aspect of this place either.

apparently i can still post remotely to here, but i get a response that says it's a malformed login and the web menu is messed up. wtf is with that? i can apparently see my friends page, even though it's bright purple and i can't find a layout i like...

and no, i don't want internet security pro 2008. i have to pay to ditch that, or get a new icky browser and run extra programs that slow my computer just so i don't have this bright red thing in the middle of my screen?

but i'm going to try that remote posting thing.

Mar. 17th, 2008

well, i said i was going to leave fandom and i've ended up here. i'm not going to say what my lj name was, though i'm sure my interests make it obvious enough.

i'm going to poke around here for a while, and see if i can deal with having a huge bright orange header and having to sign in and update through a webpage (HELL on matchdays!!), so i guess i'll be friending some of the people i know from lj, seeing what's around and whether i'm welcome here before deciding whether to make like a siamese or run away to meet a lovable alley cat.

March 2014

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